"Their names, though lost in earth below
And hence are not recorded here,
Are known where lasting pleasures flow,
Beyond the reach of death and fear"
"Their feet have trod misfortune's sand,
Their lives by hardships worn down;
They're gone, we trust, to better lands,
To brighter sunshine of their own."

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Yesterday, in honor of memorial day, my dad and I went to 2 Revolutionary Soldiers Cemeteries that are near our house, in Pennsylvania. The poem was one of the things written on the monument at the first cemetery; the picture comes from the second. It was nice to see that both sites were well-kept, with new flags and well-trimmed grass. The saddest part, though, is that all of the soldiers who's graves were marked, were unknown. The plaque at one of the cemeteries said that there were other graves nearby, but they didn't know how to locate them. These men gave their lives hundreds of years ago, but we don't even know who they are...

-M.

I haven't made a goal post in about a month,

due to a load of final papers, final exams, and general procrastination. Actually I’ve been out of school for 2 weeks, so procrastination really is a biggie, here. Consequently I’ve also done absolutely nothing in the last 2 weeks that I can count as anywhere near consequential. My daily routine has basically become me waking up somewhere between 11 and 12, then going on tumblr for ages, playing an online game, watching tv with lunch, and going back on the computer for most of the day (more tv and movies with dinner), until I finally go to bed around 4am. It’s ridiculous.

In mounting frustration, I’ve tried to take control and do some dishes and laundry the past couple of days, but I still feel utterly unaccomplished. Every summer, without the structure of schoolwork and things that need to get done at certain times, I feel like I flail around hopelessly, getting nothing done, until August, when I realize I’ve frittered away most of the summer. At that point I make a few last attempts to cram in something worthwhile in the 2-3 weeks I have left before school starts up again. I don’t want that to happen again this year. So, I’ve had almost an entire month to wind down from school, and I’m ready to start living my summer.

The first thing I want to change is when I’m waking up (and consequently, when I’m going to bed, as well). It doesn’t matter that I have the same amount of time between 12pm and 4am as I would if I changed my sleeping time to 12am and my wake up time to 8am; every time I wake up at 12, I feel like I’ve already wasted most of the day. Then I feel like I’ve done nothing productive, and have no reason to do anything else productive, and my day goes from there…Not to mention that I’m usually the only person awake from about 12-4am, so I can’t accomplish anything that would be noisy. Naturally I turn to watching netflix on my laptop with the door closed, or I have another go on the internet. To be more productive, goal 12 is: I want to start going to bed by 2 am, and waking up by 10am. It might only be a 2 hour difference, but I know I won’t even bother trying if I make it too drastic.

Just waking up isn’t nearly enough, so this week’s other goal (goal 13) is to make sure I start up my weekly goal posts again. I should be able to accomplish writing once a week, and quite honestly, I’ve missed it.

-M.

So, all this rapture business...

I don't believe in it. Of course, I consider myself agnostic, so I'm not really religious, but even if I were I still don't think I'd believe this. It's highly commercialized. Having enough money to put up billboards all over the place about the end of the world is ridiculous. While I appreciate and respect (and am fascinated by, in many cases) peoples' religions, I don't understand a religion that forces its beliefs on others or a religion that somehow manages to control large amounts of money. If the idea of rapture was simply spread through meetings between the people that believed in this, and people's personal communications--talking to people they know, making a post on their blog, group discussions among the believers--that'd be fine. I think the thing that's bothering me most isn't the idea of rapture and believing in it or not. The ludicrous thing is how commercial this is, and how many people are waiting to go to heaven or be forced to endure horribleness until they're consumed in fire, or whatnot. (Okay, I don't know all the specifics and technical words and such, sorry.)

On one hand, it's awesome for the people who finally spent money on big trips these past couple months, or took May 21st's death sentence as their chance to finally do something they've been meaning to do all their life. In fact, I applaud these people. So many people wait to do big things until they're retired, or they wait too long and never get the chance to do something that means a lot to them. So, if rapture means that people are living by the motto "live like you're going to die tomorrow", I can't find fault in that.

On the other hand, the people who are telling others that they're going to burn in hell for all eternity for not being "normal", are despicable. I don't understand people who say you can't be anything but heterosexual, white, a man (or a female who defers to men, constantly, and has no self-value), a virgin until marriage, and extremely religious. They dive into the bible and come up with abstract quotes condemning people for different things but, of course, find no quotes that would create fault in themselves.

So, if rapture happens later today, my deepest apologies for not believing sooner. Either way, I can't stand those people that condemn others for things they find fault with and can "support" with quotes from the bible, and I also can't stand how commercialized religion seems to have become. In the mean time, have a nice rapture-free day!

-M.